Well if Jason is able to post from deployment, then I have no excuses.  Faye and I are doing well here on the home front.  Faye loves her preschool class and her ballet lessons with Miss Laura.  She is at an age of naming her dolls and her things, and lots of things are named “Miss Laura.”  Another major Faye favorite is Thomas the Train.  “Salty” (one the characters on the show) is another name she gives her things.  The Thomas show (saved thanks to our DVR) is now the only show she is interested in watching; even Sesame Street got the boot.

From this photo, you can see that Faye still loves to bake with me.  Here she is helping to cut cookies in the shape of Hebrew letters for her Sunday School group.  She already knows the three letters in “Shabbat,” which she can say by name.

The deployment still seems to be flying by, or at least time is flying, but it also seems like there is so much more to go.  It feels like forever since Jason was within these walls, and his voice just in the other room.  With the help of Skype, we are very lucky to see his face and hear his voice every once in a while.  I am happy to report that our paper chain now only goes around the door in our living room, and no longer fits all the way over to the window.  With any luck, Jason will be home before we tear off the last loop.

We have continued to pass the time by traveling, mostly to my parents’ house in Va Beach.  We were so happy to be able to spend the Jewish holidays among family and friends up there.  I also made a trip up this month for my 10 year high school reunion.  We lived in the same school district for all 13 years, so I graduated with some of my kindergarten classmates (in the photo are 2 of them).  I was a little worried about going to the reunion alone, but the event turned out to be a blast.  It was a little odd to be surrounded by faces from 10 years ago, but it was also a lot of fun.

While Faye is in school, I have my work cut out for me trying to complete yet another course in my degree program (Jewish Education), and having taken on 2 Bat Mitzvah students.  There is a lot of work to be done for both, so I am definitely busy.  With any luck, I will at least have my course work finished before Jason comes home.  I also hope to give some time to the Obama campaign here in my swing state of NC (vote early if you can!).  I am so excited and nervous for this election to be decided on already and for an intelligent, trustworthy, and honorable president to get into the White House again.

We want to thank everyone who hosted us and for the great care you all showed us over the past three weeks.  Even though we got a bit homesick, we really enjoyed all of time we spent with our friends and family.  Thank you!

Faye and I finally made it home on August 10th after a full day of driving.  We had planned on staying the night at my mom’s after dropping her off, but decided to just keep going home.  We didn’t want to unload our bags one more time and Faye was so excited to finally be going home.

It was hard for Faye to fall asleep that first night, because she was so excited to be in her own bed again.  I have to say it was hard for me too.  Part of the reason we left was to have a distraction from Jason’s deployment.  Coming home reminded us that he wasn’t going to be back here for a while.  It was definitely a softer blow after being away for so long.

One way Faye and I are counting down the days Jason is away is through a paper chain.  We made it before he left, and he even snuck in little messages on every few links.  Faye gets to tear off a link every morning to move us one day closer to daddy coming home.

His deployment is also a bit easier with the help of skype – a program that lets us talk face to face for free!  We both have cameras in our computers, and we can look right at one another and talk as if we were in the same room.  It is a great way for Faye to bond with Daddy and for him to enjoy her even when she isn’t talking.  With his camera, Jason has also made a few videos for Faye to let her enjoy story time with Daddy while he is away.

She is so excited to have any contact with Daddy, and especially loves the things he sends her from Japan.  Above is Faye in her Japanese pajamas that I had to beg her to take off – even though she was sweating in them!

Faye starts pre-school on Monday and we are both so excited.  I can’t believe she is almost 3!  She will begin ballet the following week and I know she will have such a good time.  The busy schedule will definitely make the next few months go by so much faster!

Faye, Mom, and I spent a great day at Sesame Place in Pennsylvania today.  We all enjoyed free admission thanks to Jason’s active service in the Corps.  Faye has started to get a bit home sick at the end of our trip, so we have really tried to get her excited about this day.  She is a big fan of the show, and was so excited to meet all of the characters.

The day started out rainy, so we were a little worried that we wouldn’t be able to go.  When we realized it was today or never, we decided to give it a shot and hope the rain held off.  Thankfully, we lucked out.  Although the clouds got dark at times, we didn’t have a drop of rain.  The park did not have as many rides for Faye as I had hoped, but she enjoyed the live “Elmo’s World” show, the Lazy River with mommy, and all of the splash areas of the park.  We also really enjoyed the parade and meeting all of the characters.  All in all, a great day.

Earlier in the week, we stopped through Bethlehem, PA to visit my good friend Vicki and meet her guy David.  It was a really great visit, thanks Vicki!

Check out the NY Road Trip photo Album to view our latest photos.

The day after Jason left for his big adventure, Faye and I packed up and headed out for our own summer fun.  We started the trip at my parent’s house 3 hours away where we spent time with family and friends.  My mom then joined us for the rest of our trip up to Philly and New York.  The Philly trip only took us 5 hours – much shorter than our usual 10-12.  With only one stop, it seemed like a very short ride and left plenty of time for relaxing at Grandpa’s house.

Mom, Faye and I will head out tomorrow for NY city, where we have only a few stops planned over the course of a few days.  From there, we are off to visit the Eckers family upstate NY where I plan to do a lot of relaxing.  I think relaxing is the theme of this trip, with lots of help from grandparents and family friends.  Faye is enjoying herself, and has only once requested that we go home now.  I hope to be up here visiting until around mid-August, when we will begin moseying back down towards home.

Although Jason is our usual photographer, I have been given specific instructions from him to take many photos while he is away.  I will do my best to take them and post them here soon.

To begin with, Sonia’s unveiling will be on Sunday, May 25th at 10:30 am.  Following the short ceremony, we will meet for lunch at Ben’s Deli in Woodbury, a kosher restaurant near the cemetery.  Click here for more details.

Sonia’s birthday is today, April 24th.  She would have been one.  Below is Jason’s first post after her birth, one year ago.

Sonia Chaya Rubin was born just before midnight on April 24th.  Shannon was a trooper as usual.  The epidural really helped to preserve her strength for when she really needed it.  I could not believe how quick she pushed that kid out.  We were watching the Daily Show when she suddenly told me that she really felt like she needed to start pushing.  I grabbed the nurse, who grabbed the doctor.  He went to do his normal check and surprisingly told us that the head was right there ready to come out.

No one had to tell Shannon to push, she kept asking if she could continue to push, with or without a contraction.  I doubt there were more than ten pushes before Sonia popped out and let out a beautiful cry.  Unlike Faye, who needed some stimulation to get her moving around and talking Sonia was anxious to interact with her new world.

With all that we’ve gone through with the baby, I think we both were hesitant to see what she looked like.  All our fears were removed once we saw this beautiful girl.  She was plump and healthy, like her sister (despite the underestimation of weight by the ultrasound techs) and as cute as could be.  She looks just like her sister (although a little less chubby in the cheeks), but has a bit more hair than Faye did and it is a little bit darker too.

This really has been some year.  My life will never be the same, and I am so thankful for that.  I am honored to have been Sonia’s mom, and I am so thankful for every minute of her 4 1/2 months on this earth.  She was such a blessing to us, and the few months of cuddles I got from her made everything else seem to fade away.  When she was diagnosed during my 5th month of pregnancy, the doctors were not sure she would survive her first days, let alone months.  I will never forget the doctor who suggested terminating the pregnancy because Sonia wouldn’t be a healthy baby.  He wanted us to understand her chances of survival and how it would affect our family to live with a sick child.  I only wish he could understand how deeply Sonia’s life touched our family and so many of you in her short life.  It was a beautiful life and I am so thankful for every moment of it.

I am also so deeply thankful for the way Sonia’s life touched so many of you.  As the mother of a sick baby, I didn’t get to parade around and show off my beautiful bundle to the world, something I still miss so deeply today.  But knowing that so many of you were following along with Sonia through this page has brought me so much joy.  I looked forward to checking in throughout the days of her life – especially the harder ones – to read your comments and feel your love and support.

A part of me has put aside my memories over the past 7.5 months in order to survive Sonia’s death.  But now, on her birthday, I want to take the time to really remember my sweet girl.  She had the sweetest eyes and smile.  When she was on ECMO (life support) in her first weeks, we joked that she was one of the few who could pull off cute in that situation.  And even when the doctors packed weight and calories onto her tiny body, she held her own in the cute department and made all of her care takers smile. 

My fondest memories are toward the end of her life when she was doing so well.  I would call to check in only to find she was out with Dr. Pettie on rounds or hanging out with the nurses.  On one occasion I walked into her room to find an empty bed.  When I went to find the nurse, a few of them were smiling at me and asking how I could walk right past Sonia in their arms at the nurse’s station.  I also fondly remember coming in when she was tiny to find her hair in different “styles”.  The night nurses would bathe her and spike or play with her hair so that it looked different in the mornings. One nurse even stuck a bow to her head and the heads of the other babies in her pod on a particularly rough day.  I remember the 3 times we took Sonia outside, and how she fell asleep on 2 of those trips.  The first time was such an event, and I was so thankful for my friend Erin who went out with us.  By that time, I knew so many families and everyone was excited for her to finally feel the sunshine and breathe the fresh air.  It is amazing how the families pulled for each other’s babies and really took care of one another. 

Today, I want to remember the beauty that was my Sonia, apart from her illnesses.  The weight of her in my arms was one of the best feelings in the world.  And though it was only for a short part of her life, I know how much of a blessing those times were.  Too many mommies never get that chance.  I am thankful for all of you who were able to visit her in person.  That means so much to me.  I am also thankful for all of the families and babies we got to know during Sonia’s life.  My life was turned upside down and inside out during Sonia’s life, but it was enriched beyond words in those short months.  I am thankful for every part of it, and for the chance to love on and comfort my sweet baby Sonia.  I pray for happy memories today (once I get to sleep and awake again) and for my joy for Sonia’s life to shine through my sadness.  Thank you again for all of your love and prayers and support.  I am so thankful for each and every one of you.

QUICK REQUEST: I am going to be putting together a scrapbook of my Sonia’s photos and photos of friends, family, and doctors and nurses who were a part of her life.  If you were a part of our journey up there either as a visitor or fellow heart family or hospital staff, please photos of you and any memories you want to share.  I want to try to remember as much of her life and the people who were a part of it in this book.  Thanks in advance!

Lots of love,

Shannon